Look Who Is Talking. Part Three.
Posted By admin on June 3, 2010
Greetings,
We keep on publishing thematic sketches of the big interview of Marianna Tambellini with Liubov Latypova, the life-coach for women. In this part, these successful Russian ladies living abroad are touching upon the mysterious Russian soul issue and discussing what are the benefits in the spouses’ different approaches to life.
Marianna Tambellini (M.T.): I have experienced the same feeling when I arrived here. It did not occur right away, it came a little later. And here arises the notorious issue of the difference in mentalities, which you have already mentioned. This is one of the most important problems my clients face. Based on your experience with the Americans, and in general with other peoples, what are the main differences between us in your opinion? Personally, it’s more of a question about the phenomenal Russian soul for me (if there is any). Why is the Russian soul weary and longing for something while being abroad? I cannot understand this, because I do not feel any of the kind.
Liubov Latypova (L.L.) : Neither do I.
М.Т.: Probably because we are at ease here.
L.L.: My soul is not weary, I have found things to do. Maybe I am just not a typical Russian representative. My environment are university professors (my husband is a professor); they are very warm people. We have got things to talk about, especially when I started to develop my business at a higher level of success. They are very interested in it, and I can get a lot from them.
Another thing is that my husband and I have profound differences not only in mentalities, but in our approaches to life. First, he is much older than me (15 years older actually). But this, in fact, is a small challenge when people meet for a reason. He is fairly well-balanced, conservative, down to earth. His strategy is aimed at preserving what there is. And I am a Gemini according to the zodiac, a high-flyer of an innovative make-up as was confirmed recently by some tests. That is, I am bored when all is quiet. I always need to explore and to start something new.
At first, our approaches were the sticking point, when we were sort of diametrically opposed to each other. But in reality those approaches to life turned to be cooperative. When we realized that, and when we started to research further on, those turned to be very complementary approaches, very complementary strategies. Because when I am rushing forward without taking into consideration some important details, my husband slows me down and asks important questions, and sometimes helps me to work on them. For example, when I fly into some sort of another adventure with American coaches, their programs and products, I am ready to give all my money if they promise the refund miracles. He slows me down, spends his time on some studies, shares the results with me, and only then I make a balanced decision.
On the other hand, if we lived only in this kind of down-to-earth reality, it would not be possible for him to control everything and save everything, so my vigor makes him move forward. As a result, I always emphasize that our combined results are better than when we do something on our own. It is superb when we work together. Our house is completely different now, because with his absolute taste and his ability to find something original, and with my innovative approach, we have managed to find the right place for every thing in the house.
M.T.: You have got a wonderful harmony. Dan introduces a sound skepticism, and you bring in an impulse to the movement.
L.L.: Yes, but one has to achieve that harmony, one needs to understand what gift is hidden for you in your partner’s different approach to life. When a woman tries to adapt her partner for herself, she starts complaining, “He does not like me, he does not understand me, and in general he does not act the way I want.” In fact, thank God that he does not. And when you understand that, you just let your partner do things that he does best. And you do what you can do best.
M.T. You have said about how important it is to move towards each other, to talk to each other, and to achieve mutual understanding. I remember your great articles on how to build financial relationships in marriage. It is very important, because if there is no money, then there is no quality of life. And if the family has the money, but relationships are built in the wrong way, then there is no life, no peace in the family…
To be continued.
(1 ratings, average: 5 out of 5)
Загрузка ...
Comments
Leave a Reply
Please note: Comment moderation is currently enabled so there will be a delay between when you post your comment and when it shows up. Patience is a virtue; there is no need to re-submit your comment.
You must be logged in to post a comment.